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In this photo released by Fox shows "The Moment Of Truth" host Mark Walberg. The game show will use a lie-detector test to determine whether or not contestants are willing to tell the truth for a chance to win half a million dollars. The show premiers Jan. 23 (Kelsey McNeal, Associated Press)

This has got to be a pretty fine time to be making reality shows. The economy looks likes it’s headed in the crapper, so just about anyone will suck it up if they think they might get a shiny new dime out of the deal. There’s a writers strike, so there’s not much competition out there. Thus, anything that has no originality whatsoever is in high demand. Lastly, a vast majority of our population no longer appears to have any shame whatsoever. This means you can do whatever you want to them and they are so goddamned stupid that they, and everyone else, will pretend it’s amusing in some way. Sadly, there’s one television show that goes out of its way to prove this theorem, The Moment of Truth.

It’s on Fox, which is probably no surprise. They’ve brought us such wonderful programming as American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, Cops, and probably another 50 or 60 shows just as bad that I no longer care to remember. Yeah, they also brought us The Simpsons and Family Guy, but the bad more than cancels out the good. Plus, their news coverage leaves more than a little bit to be desired, so they pretty much deserve any shit I can throw their way.

For those of you lucky enough not to have seen the show, I’ll try to explain. The contestants are hooked up to a lie detector and asked embarrassing questions in front of their friends, family and the nation. That’s really about it. It’s horrifying for the person strapped to the lie detector. It’s excruciating for the friends and family. It’s both of those adjectives and so much more for the viewer. Honestly, I can’t believe they could find anyone to go along with it, but as I said in the beginning, shame is becoming a precious commodity these days.

I remember a time when there were just quiz shows. It rewarded you for being intelligent, or for having some sort of skill or just for being a lucky bastard. Now we’re rewarding honesty, or possibly the ability to lie very well or probably not caring about looking like an idiot on national TV. Forget Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader? They should call this show Do You Have More Audacity Than O.J. Simpson?

I’m not above the fray; I just don’t feel the need to display it on national television. I remember when I was a kid, I got this game called Scruples. It was pretty tame by today’s standards. There were cards that asked simple questions like would you cheat on a test, or would you kick your golf ball out of the woods if no one was looking, or would you steal cable? I was about 10 years old when I first got it and it was sort of fun to play with friends. I don’t think I ever got it out again once we turned 12.

There just wasn’t much suspense. By that time, we were all crooked bastards and knew everyone else in our group of friends was also a crooked bastard. It was really pretty easy to guess what the answers were going to be. The game then became who could lie the best. We were all really good at that, too. It’s one thing to know you’re a good liar. It’s another to prove it repeatedly. I think we just gave up and went back to Monopoly, where something like being a rat bastard is strongly encouraged.

Anyway, the biggest problem I have with The Moment of Truth is that it’s just a matter of time until we use it for something other than “entertainment.” I mean, why go through all the screening and background checks for contestants when we already have the court systems. That whole trial by a jury of your peers is so fucking tired already, we might as well just have the accused as contestants on the show. We could decide a person’s guilt or innocence in one suspense-filled 12-minute time block, get a snack during the commercial and then get right back to the judging. If they were capital cases, the last five minutes could be a big execution extravaganza. I bet all them guilty folks would light up real pretty if you pumped them full of electricity all at the same time.

They could even come up with a new sort of oath. “I, state your name, do solemnly swear, sort of, that I will tell the whole truth, or possibly just lie very well, and nothing but the truth, or maybe lie my ass off, so help me God ... or maybe the devil ... or whoever ... but I really do promise to be entertaining ... seriously!” We wouldn’t even need them to put their hand on a Bible. Instead, they could just wrap their arms around one of those big screen plasma TVs.

It could even be used for civil court. We could check out adultery claims, see if people really do have whiplash, or finally discover how much emotional distress has really been inflicted on a plaintiff. Every ounce of problems we have could all be ironed out on television 24 hours a day. Sure, some of those things seem sort of personal and private, but really, I don’t think we care much about that sort of thing anymore.