Some folks can do things and other folks can’t. I know that’s a tough thing to say because here in America we like all things to at least be possible for all people. Let’s be honest though, they really aren’t. Sure, theoretically the guy who sells crystal meth behind a convenience store could become president, but realistically it’s just not going to happen. You’re either born a leader or you’re born to sell meth, or you’re somewhere in between. You can’t just throw a rock out a window and hit someone who will be a good leader, something that might be good to think about with the looming elections.

I sort of feel like striving to become a leader is like striving to become a world renowned concert pianist. You’re either capable or you’re not. You can practice all damned day long and try your ass off but when it’s all said and done, there has to be something special on the inside. Nevertheless, I came across some tips that are supposed to help anybody become a better leader so I thought we could take a look at a few of them. By the way, if you believe any of it, you’re probably not much of a leader, but whatever.

Demonstrate Enthusiasm — The idea is that leaders are passionate and are capable of getting others to be, as well. I guess it’s true, but just because you are excited about something that doesn’t necessarily translate into getting others to feel that way. Once, I was extremely excited about a night of cocktailing. I called everyone and they all declined or had other plans. I still got drunk, it’s just that no one followed. A leader without followers is sometimes just a drunk guy by himself.

Articulate a Compelling Course of Action — Inspiring leaders have a consistent, memorable, and very specific vision. Once again, I can go along with this premise. Leading is mostly just about the big picture; the specifics often need to be left to the ones who aren’t leading. It’s nice to think of a General leading his troops into battle, but most of the time, the fella in charge is quite aways back there planning it all out. A good leader knows you can’t do everything by yourself.

Sell the Benefit — Leaders know it’s not about them, it’s about everyone else. Let’s be honest, most people don’t really give a crap about what everyone gets. They are far more concerned about what they themselves are getting. A leader tells them what’s in it for them and makes them want to follow to their rewards. It should be noted that presidential candidates tend to promise everything to everybody all of the time, so that everyone is happy and voting for them. This is not being a leader, it’s being a liar.

Tell Stories — The thinking is that inspired leaders tell memorable stories. Personal stories connect the person with their audience, leaving them with the feeling of “Hey, this guy’s just like me, except talented.” It’s a fine way to reach folks on an emotional level. You can have statistics, flow charts, and hard evidence, but if you tell a person a story about it, they will remember and respond.

Invite Participation — Leaders need to bring people into the process. This is probably more true now than in the past. In the past, you could be a leader just because everyone was scared shitless of you. This is still standard operating procedure in several places, but it’s slowly getting better. If everyone feels involved you don’t have to lead as much, which strangely, makes you a better leader.

Reinforce an Optimistic Outlook — No one who is a leader gets up and says, “I gotta tell you, we are in shit up to our eyeballs and I have no freaking clue how to get out of it. Things are going to hell in a hand basket, so hold on tight. It’s not going to get any better.” People have got to believe they can do something and optimism helps a whole hell of a lot. A good leader can give people a pep talk and get things back on track.

Encourage Potential — It’s pretty simple, tell people they are doing a good job. Leaders have a way of doing this, even if the person isn’t doing that great of a job. “Wow, I really appreciate how you didn’t fuck up the first part of the project all that much. Now, if you can do the second part just as well, we’ll be in business.” If you only get negative criticism, it becomes a little hard to imagine yourself doing anything worthwhile. People want to believe they can be better than they are, but sometimes it’s nice if someone else believes it, too.

Now that I look back on all the tips, I agree with most of them. Leaders do possess these qualities, but I’m still not convinced you can teach them to anyone. Leaders should act that way instinctively, not because they’re going down a checklist. Otherwise, it’s not being a leader; it’s being a con man. Actually, when I look around at the people we call leaders these days that seems to be the case, a bunch of people trying to convince us they know what’s best for us when it’s really just what’s best for them. We used to feel inspired, not we just feel grifted.

Michael Coulter can be reached at mcoulter@parkland.edu.