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I gotta say, this has actually been a fun little post-season for baseball so far. As you may know, my Cardinals aren't around this year, but I'm actually okay with it. It's nice to sit back and not really care about who wins or loses and just enjoy the game for the sake of the game. Baseball is really just a soap opera anyway and most of the fun is in talking about the games, before, during and after them. In fact, talking is really a huge part of baseball. Fans talk about it, players talk about it, managers talk about it, journalists talk about it. Baseball is really just a lot of chatter.

Baseball is played with a sort of stately pace that we don't see much anymore and that really lends itself to conversation. Everybody talks in baseball ... about not much of anything. Watch the fellas on the sideline in a football game. They are going over plays, talking about defenses, trying desperately to figure out a way to defeat the other team. Basketball is pretty much the same, most of the guys are watching the game attentively and during the time outs, the coach frantically scribbles the next play they will run on a whiteboard. In baseball though, you look in the dugout and it's a bunch of guys sitting around and talking.

Sure, they stand up and pay attention during important parts of the game, but most of the time, they chew tobacco or sunflower seeds, talk to each other, and generally play a little grabass. Other sports have a lot of schemes and plays, but baseball mostly just has adjustments. Some of the adjustments are to the outfield positioning or a hitter's approach at the plate. Most of their adjustments, however, are to the ball cap, the batting gloves, the uniform and most commonly, the testicles. Mostly, though, they just adjust themselves, play the game and talk about it. The guys on the bench don't even usually speak about any future strategy, only about what just happened. "Geez Louise, Jimmy really hit the piss out of that ball."

I used the word "chatter" earlier and I really like that word. I first heard it in Little League, I suppose. During those games, we were expected to talk to the other team and our own players at an almost constant rate. I suppose it was an attempt to keep us involved in some way. It was nothing too in depth, just general small talk regarding the game. This was called chatter. I know this because if it suddenly became even a little quiet, we would hear something along the lines of, "C'mon now fellas, let's hear a little chatter out there."

At this juncture, we would begin talking to no one in particular, just talking, everyone on the field at the same damned time. If your team was in the on defense, it was usually something towards the pitcher. "C'mon now, he ain't no batter." This wasn't so much a reflection on that particular batter's skill, because we said the virtually the same thing no matter who was up. "No batter, no batter, no batter," right up until the pitch was thrown. At this point, the entire process began again until there were three outs and we were batting.

When your side was at the plate, the chatter became a little more specific. "C'mon now, hit it where they ain't" or "Make him throw to you now." You could even throw in the batter's name here and there. "Let's go, Jerry. He can't get nothing by you." Of course, the other team was doing the opposite of what you were doing each time, so it invariably became a general hum of indistinguishable shouting. To be honest, you couldn't even tell it was there unless you listened very closely.

That never happens with my life these days. Not once at work have I walked into a guy's office and said, 'C'mon now, Carl. Get the report done, get the report done. You know no one can do a report like you. You the man, now." I've never once greeted the mail carrier with a "No bills! No bills!" chant. Occasionally, during drinking, someone will be encouraged to drink a little faster or a little more, but that's pretty much it.

At this point, my dog ends up getting most of my chatter in everyday life. "C'mon now, big time boy, who wants to go pee all over West Side Park? Who's the pee boy? Who's the pee boy? Will's the pee boy. C'mon now." Not surprisingly, he treats this the same way little leaguers do. He basically ignores it and carries on with his business as if no one was talking at all.

Much of the general crap that comes out of my mouth is really just chatter and I'm sure that stems from playing baseball when I was a kid, talking for the sake of talking. If that general hum is in the air, I actually begin to relax and focus a little more. Baseball is the only sport where what should be chaos somehow becomes calming. There're still a few games left, so I'll watch all I can and chatter the whole time I do it. It's my last few chances to not look like a complete idiot ... at least until next spring.